Former Premiership midfielder Darren Eadie says his frustration after retiring from professional football five years ago means he almost can't bear to watch the game.
The ex-Norwich and Leicester City star quit in 2003 after a persistent knee injury and, having returned to Norwich, is still coming to terms with it.
The 32-year-old, whose parents June and Malcolm live in Corsham, was plagued by injury during a promising career which never reaped the rewards it deserved.
The electric winger only managed 251 appearances in a ten-year career and the mention of his name brings the word unfulfilled' to the lips of any Canary or Foxes fan.
He is now involved covering Norwich for Sky Sports and Anglia and has other business ventures, but, sitting in a coffee shop on the bank of the river Wensum in Norwich, it is hard not to notice the regret in his voice.
"It is really difficult watching games as all my mates are still playing," said Eadie, whose brother Colin is opening up a diving shop in Melksham.
"One thing people do not understand is the doctors say you can't play anymore but you can still go and see your mates play, so it is cruel. You almost need rehab just for that.
"I've been asked to do some coaching, but even that is hard and I have other interests like shooting and Norwich is so far away from anyone I can't give up three hours on a Saturday."
The former Corsham School pupil, who also played football and rugby for the town, has had 17 operations on his troublesome left knee, and was cursed with bad luck after the crucial operation, in 2002, to graft fresh cells to his hyaline cartilage failed.
"It happens to four per cent of people, that is how unlucky I was. I made the decision I didn't want to go through another year out again," said Eadie, who was called up to the England squad in 1997.
"But five years down the line, I probably would have taken another year out if I could play again, but, at the time, I felt I had no option.
"I started in the Premier League and finished there so I don't know how I would feel dropping down divisions but I finished at the top. Though it would have been nice if it was my choice.
"There are no regrets I was lucky. I started early and finished early, so I guess it balances out."
There was so much early promise in Eadie's career, which started at Swindon Town's Centre of Excellence before a brief spell as a schoolboy at Southampton.
"I remember standing in front of my class at school, where we had to say what we wanted to be when we grew up", he said.
"Everyone was saying things like a vet but I said I wanted to be a footballer and got laughed at."
It was while he was with the Saints he attracted the attention of Norwich and moved to Norfolk aged 16.
"I always wanted to go to Norwich because they had a good history but it was difficult moving at that age," he said.
"After a couple of months I said to mum and dad I wanted to come home, but they made me stay.
"It was the right thing to do, I didn't really think about it at the time, but it must have been very hard for them."
He stayed at Carrow Road until 1999 before being enticed by Martin O'Neill to Leicester - for £3million - and it is his spell at Filbert Street, which is his biggest regret.
"The Leicester fans never saw the best of me," said the keen fisherman.
"I was played up front at lot of the time and then at wing back which I hate, so I never got a decent run on the left wing.
"But Martin O'Neill is the best manager I have played under."
Now living in Norwich with wife Kelly, son Taylor, ten, and daughter Lola, two, Eadie, who had his last knee operation just nine weeks ago, is throwing himself into new business opportunities as well as his media work.
He is involved with a company, The Magic of Motoring, who have secured the rights to sell Shell merchandise.
"Fast cars and footballers go together," he joked. "We are the only people in the world able to sell it and next year we are going to all the Formula One races, which is an opportunity not to be missed."
But, while there is frustration for his former career, you can see his passion for this new project as Eadie looks to the future.
"This year there is 60 years of Shell with Ferrari and next year it is with Goodwood," he enthused.
"They have connections with everyone and it is going to be great."
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