IT is very hard to find some words that describe my feelings after last Friday's night game against Newport in the European Cup.
I feel proud but perplexed in the way we played. I feel angry but annoyed with the way we played and I feel happy but unhappy with the way we finished the game.
We played all the rugby. We kept the ball for large periods of the game and we looked very dangerous.
However, we could not get across the try line. On three occasions late on in the second half we were fingertips away from scoring.
Credit to Newport, their defence was heroic and one person in particular stood out.
Their lock Ian Gough was immense. His work rate for a big front five man was impressive and the tackles he made were always on the gain line.
He will surely feature in a Lions side next year if he maintains his brilliant form.
Talking of brilliant form, Matt Perry is back to his best and I have full admiration for a chap who has dug deep in the last few weeks to perform for his team.
Performing for the team is the theme for this week's trip to Munster. We have to go there and get a result that no other side has achieved.
They have not been beaten at Thomond Park since the Heineken Cup began and the atmosphere that will greet us will be even more passionate than at Newport.
I can tell you, that was something special and something I never experienced when I played for them in the late eighties and early nineties.
The season just keeps rolling on and on and the big games are coming thick and fast.
As a coach you think it is brilliant, because the only way to improve yourself and the performance of the team is against the very best.
However, I do have concerns for the players and I share the remarks made by some of them over recent weeks. Physically, what we are asking them to do is impossible and potentially damaging to themselves and the sport.
The game is more physical and more demanding than it has ever been and the periods for which the players have to perform has increased.
Coupled with this, the competition is greater and players will not be rested because the matches are so important.
However, I will try to rest some players over the next six weeks, purely because if I do not, they will burn out and will not want to play the game.
It is a sorry sight when you know a player is going through the motions because he has had too much rugby.
The player is not conscious of this fact and he tries even harder to put his game right when in fact what he needs is a long break to recharge the batteries and get the appetite back for playing.
You must remember that we are still in the infancy of professionalism and we are all still learning.
The Tetley Bitter draw last week highlighted just how much the game still has to learn.
The luck of the draw has put us against Gloucester at home in the cup and if we win that one, Leicester at home the following week.
Do not get me wrong. I am very happy with that because those big games are what the spectators want.
My argument is, and I stress this is only hypothetical at this stage, if we were to play Leicester, the timing could not be worse.
Potentially, we could have nine, ten players hitting lumps out of each other a week before they play for one another against Australia.
But we must not dwell on that and instead concentrate on our back-to-back fixtures against Munster.
It is no secret that we have to get two very good victories to keep our European hopes alive.
Munster have won one away from home, against Castres, and hold the ascendancy in the group.
I am confident we can do it. Our performances of late have been exciting as we are creating a lot of chances.
What we must do, and I know I have mentioned it before, is be clinical and finish our chances off.
These matches are won and lost by the smallest errors and we have to make sure that the game we play does not contain any.
These weekends make special memories and like our famous trip to Toulouse last year, I believe we can produce a performance that people will talk about for years.
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