SATURDAY was Swindon's sixth stunning poetry slam. To all who took part wham bam thank you mam.

It takes great courage to read out loud, flash your naked verse, unproud. For most budding poets it was their first time wowing the audience with words that rhyme.

And you out there laughing, think it's so easy? Take a mic and try, you'll soon feel queasy. Amazingly these brave bards managed not to flinch. Fighting fear and stutters, they made it look a cinch. Some claim this lively evening is all in jest and fun. But yes there is a special prize for the favourite one.

Marked on their delivery, response and skill of writing, the night grew quite tense and ever more exciting. From Beckham's foot to McDonald's food the themes were varied, yet seldom rude.

There was Rosemary lusting after a strong, dark oak presumably her metaphor for a fit bloke.

And Lachlan had his own hungry cross to bear a paean to roughage, just like the Lord's prayer. Christina, meanwhile, was glad to stay devoutly single. Along with a chap called Tony, who piped a maypole jingle.

As the poets were whittled down to a meagre five, only the wittiest wordsmith was a dead cert to survive.

Mark McKergow and Neil Patterson's work both had humorous rings, while others seemed to get bogged down with deep and dark meanings.

That's not to say their efforts weren't perfectly sincere. It's just that such subtle nuances are rather hard to hear.

So it was down to Mark or Neil to claim a precious prize. I thought Neil had it in the bag, until a big surprise. Mark went first with Be Bop, a snappy, clappy number. Then Neil followed suit but dropped a huge poetic blunder. Of all unsavoury subjects, he opted for BO. And laid into his friend, Nigel, for having it, oh no!

His confident oration, alas, did not amuse a song about your smelly mate is surely bound to lose. Which meant, of course, for beaming Mark the very greatest news. Because he scooped the trophy, flowers, more chocolate bars and booze.

But the game is far from over, of this you must be clear start practising your poems and be sure to play next year!