I guess as Christmas is about miracles, it shouldn't really come as any great surprise that the following email was sent to me 'Please find attached for publication on Thursday, 25th December '
And naturally, I will be turning in on this most festive of days solely to ensure that we do just that.
On the other hand, how nice it might have been to have received a press release from Swindon-based First Great Western declaring: 'One (and ONLY one mind you) of our trains actually ran on time this year.' But I guess that really would have been praying for too much.
In fact, we commuters would probably be better served by simply dropping a note to Santa in the hope that might give us a lift in his sleigh over Christmas week, solely to ensure that we can get into work on time.
Now I'm sure that you, like me, will have been indulging this past week in a few extra business lunches.
After all, 'tis the season to be jolly', and over the last few days, I've certainly noticed an increase in the number of Swindon business folk taking this to heart.
But a cautionary tale here try not to order anything that might display a certain 'e-l-a-s-t-i-c-i-t-y'.
I only mention this because at one recent lunch, I watched in bemused horror as a businessman, keen (read: desperate) to impress his clients, tugged on a pork rib while telling a story.
The gristly rind however just refused to give, and as the portly MD gave it one last tug, it snapped back, broke, and flew into the face of one of his guests.
On another Christmas theme, I have been asked by one small Swindon businessman (I am of course referring to the size of his firm) whether he should buy gifts for his 20 staff.
In short, I said, no. As featured earlier in this week's Quote of The Day, the US cartoonist and humourist Scott Adams had it right when he said: 'The best balance of morale for employee productivity can be described this way: Happy but with low self esteem.'
Consequently, giving gifts to subordinates is frankly sending out the wrong message.
Far better to say along the lines of: "Look, I've something very important to tell you, but I don't want to ruin your Christmas, so go home, have a great time and we'll speak in the New Year."
This gesture will show that you care but at the same time, unnerve your staff just enough to keep them on their toes. Which'll be handy come January.
As this is the last Nobody's Business before Christmas, may I take also this opportunity to wish all of you the very merriest of yuletides.
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