"COME on then, you wanna fight about it?" it's a phrase that rings through most town centres after closing time. And Swindon is no exception.
It's 11.20pm on Friday, and the tide of weekend revellers is washing through the town centre, bringing with it the weekly routine of loutish behaviour.
Two men in their early 20s dance around each other, gesturing and hurling abuse in the time-honoured fashion.
Then they dive at one another, egged on by a small crowd that has gathered around them.
"Go on, bash him," screams one girl, as the kicks and punches fly.
The fighters are grappling on the floor, tearing at each other, screaming abuse and growling like animals.
The fight ends when the loser is kicked in the head by his opponent's mates, who have joined in.
He lies on the floor, battered and bloodied, and people rush to help, as the winner races off.
We have called the police, and within minutes a trio of officers who have been patrolling the Fleet Street/Bridge Street axis of pubs and bars arrive.
The injured man is helped to his feet, and stands looking bewildered.
It would be unfair to say that all of the 6,000 revellers who descend on this part of town every weekend cause trouble. Most are just having a good time.
But nearly everyone is drunk, and the place is a mess.
The greasy smell of frying burgers hangs in the air and the streets are littered with rubbish mainly discarded flyers advertising the cheap drinks and happy hours on offer.
Men relieve themselves in alleyways, while gangs of drunken girls stagger about.
And they might be drunk, but the people heading to the clubs to carry on drinking seem to have developed a natural ability to avoid the pools of vomit that have appeared on the pavements.
More police, town centre marshals and an end to drink deals may help, but if the evidence from Swindon is anything to go by, it's a change of drinking culture that is really needed. I would drink to that.
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