SWINDON FESTIVAL OF LITERATURE: A LECTURE about mad women was just what I needed because I have never been good at spotting the crazy ones.

Usually, the only way I could tell something was up with former girlfriends was when they began frothing at the mouth or when they held a bread knife to my throat.

Now, thanks to Clare Dudman, I'm armed with all sorts of facts which will help me spot nutters before they hack me to death.

The former scientist and researcher gave an illustrated talk about women diagnosed as mentally ill and the work of Dr Heinrich Hoffman a pioneer in the field.

In the 19th century doctors used all kinds of methods in an attempt to cure madness, including leeches and draining blood from the body.

There were also more drastic measures such as pushing a patient in the river or putting them in a cage something most of us would still like to do to our relatives.

The talk, which was held at the Arts Centre in Devizes Road to help celebrate the Swindon Festival of Literature, also gave a history of the mental asylum and summarised the life of Hoffman, author of the famous book of cautionary tales for children, Struwwelpeter.

Clare, who has also had books published, including 98 Reasons For Being, finished by saying that, although the more drastic measures of treatment have gone out the window, certain aspects, such as psychotherapy remain the same.

Okay, so I may never fully understand women but her talk was both interesting and, in parts, funny.

BEN PAYNE